It's nice to be appreciated. And when someone say to me upfront don't be late, i will be just because of that. If you can’t accept it, even though you are convinced that there is no ill will on your spouse’s part, you may need to examine yourself to find out why his lateness bothers you so much. Chronic extremely early OR late = both rude, Punctual People Might Also Be Narcissists, Chronic timeliness could also be narcissistic, @"B": another proudly narcissistic fellow, @"B": thanks for confirming that I'm right, Blaming people for tardiness is narcissism, @anon#1: if you are addressing dovidjenja, Even a Brief Introduction to Mindfulness Decreases Negative Emotion, The "Coulda Regret" and the Dark Side of the Ideal Self. Own it: own your narcissism; at least be honest if you can't be caring and empathetic. 'Bigg Boss 14' wild card contestant Haryana's Sonali Phogat not too long ago opened up about lacking her late husband, on the present. I've told him a million times how much I hate being late for things but he just doesn't get it. : How to Stop Running the Show and Start Walking in Faith. I told her that no, she was always late and that it was disrespecting my time. Melinda Gates, Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation co-founder, tells David Rubenstein that she arrived late for a dinner party years ago only to find two available seats. Indian husband, 60, 'killed his wife with a bullet to the head because his dinner was late' Ashok Kumar, 60, came home drunk in city near New Dehli on Saturday, cops say If those four well-paid employees arrived 15 minutes before Weill got to the meeting, that still would have cost the company $4,250 in wasted time. The article is about chronic or frequent or constant tardiness, not occasional or rare tardiness due to circumstances beyond one's control. “My DH (Darling Husband) makes me want to kill him over dinner. I don't know what to do with him anymore. Being on time has nothing to do with manners if you have kids and a life. Advertisements Don't forget to add a comment. I don't know why 30 minutes that occur exactly the same way each day can drive us to such rage. Instead of blaming and accusing, say something like, “Here’s what I’m aiming for when I think in terms of getting somewhere within a reasonable time-frame. Late Dinner Guest . Being on time is a wonderfully thoughtful way to show your friends that you acknowledge their equality to your own precious self. I will not subject myself to mental anguish over someone else being late. My husband is always late for everything and makes me late for everything.? So I told her that being late EVERY Sunday was disrespectful to Jesus and the class. Andy is usually home by 6pm. So really, just relax already. He says in the article, "I try to get to meetings a bit early so I can see what the mood of the team is and have an opportunity to interact informally before we get down to serious business.”. We have competitions, recitals, vocal performances, games, practices, homework, robotics, student leadership technology, school events, church and community events. My wife's commute home takes her by her mom's house so she usually picks up the kids. Jonna Miller and her husband David, both in their 20's, started dating in October 2012. The most common include: While many individuals see being early as a virtue, many others don’t. It irritates me that people like my husband who go ballistic if I'm not 45 minutes early to everything are considered conscientious, and people like me who plan to arrive 5 to 15 minutes early and am rarely late are the ones considered Narcissistic. How do I deal with a chronically late spouse? Your husband is no different, so if he's defensive about everything, and always prepared for conflict, you need to dig a little deeper. It's rude, lazy and absolutely useless to a team effort. What my Family Does When My Husband is Late for Family Dinner. Get the help you need from a therapist near you–a FREE service from Psychology Today. He's late for everything except work. I think it's awfully presumptuous of you to think you know what goes on in everyone's life who's ever been late before, because, of course, I'm sure you never have been. I just bring a book when I'm going to meet someone. Why is their time more valuable than mine? The solution to this that I proposed in my original post seems, to me at least, to be the least narcissistic of all, which was: to strive to be on time, as punctuality is perceived as important to the majority of people, and is generally a good habit to develop, but also to have empathy for those that are tardy, for their reasons and intentions are not known to us. That’s not to mention that, in certain circles, “fashionably late” has always been considered “cool” and perfectly “correct.” A great deal depends upon the context. Demanding that someone be early can be just as rude. That same USA Today article mentions that Dell Computer CEO Michael Dell gets to meetings a little early, and tries to make good use of that time. So why does this second group hate to be early? ), etc. Secondly, I don't know that poster, HJ, or you, so I can't make any kind of sound judgment of their character. Always Late? So, I hope this little example has helped you understand the concept of mutual respect. And thanks for providing examples of your passive-aggressive mind-set. Why not build in an arrival time for all appointments--say 15 minutes "get acquainted time" and put a stop to judgmental thinking? Archived. In a matter of fact i am always on time, never late, but never early. Okay, "Anonymous", I'll take the bait. Place your ad here Loading... Social. I could have not said it better ...glad you did! (Forget trying to make—and keep—a reservation.) My skin isn't twenty-three and my hair doesn't shine like it did, but when I look in the mirror I still see me. If that make me selfish, probably. I don’t know how ADHD has affected certain areas of my brain but this is one area that has been particularly frustrating over the years. My bio family knows my position on inexcusable tardiness. Just stopped them from being 10-15 or more minutes late for every shift. Now you see, i like to keep people like you waiting for me, just because I know they would be pissed. Now, unless a person who is habitually late considers their non-punctuality a virtue, and derives pleasure from that self-admiration, I would say they don't qualify as narcissistic. She's a social worker and she's always late. I would say, "You can trust me, I won't let you down.". Richter. Well now you have to help me not get in the way. I have learned to be patient. So, it sounds like you are owning your narcissism, good for you. Tweet. The point is that being on time, or very close to on time, is honoring a basic social contract of trust and mutual consideration, thoughtfulness, respect, a sense of responsibility, and caring for the needs and feelings of your friends and coworkers, family, team-mates, etc. Breaking News. It is extremely difficult to have effective time management with a 13 month old, a 10 year old, an autistic child, and a schizophrenic one. It would take me almost an hour to shower, another hour to get dressed, 15 minutes to walk one NYC street block (which normally takes 1 minute? If dinner is much later than 6pm, I truly believe the kids believe the world is ending. Late for Dinner listed as LFD Looking for abbreviations of LFD? Anytime we have a party, appointment, etc. Don't do that. If you're trying to motivate someone else to stop being chronically late, remember that while Benjamin Franklin espoused the virtues of being early to bed and early to rise, there have always been others who agree instead with Franklin D. Roosevelt, who said: “I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm.”. Richter directed this comedy-drama in the spirit of Back to the Future and Peggy Sue Got Married. You are wrong. 1,679. An inner quietness. Four years ago, Wanda Dench thought she was texting her grandson to invite him for Thanksgiving dinner and accidentally invited Jamal Hinton. Ever heard of "fashionably late"? The EC's chief spokesman says the PM and EC president will try to find a … Most of us know people who are always on time because they hate being late. Come off it, this article just gives people permission to be rude. As for you making all this drama about nothing here, insulting everyone by that defensive attitude, just tell us a lot about your character and worth. He joined her for dinner in July, shortly after Lonnie’s passing. This year, the duo honored her late husband who passed away from COVID-19. What's your perspective? Husband catching his wife getting fucked by his assistant 2 weeks ago 06:10 VikiPorn cheating, husband, small tits, masturbation, wife; My husband is one naughty old fart that loves to eat pussy a lot 2 months ago 35:00 MyLust fat, whore, hooker, granny, husband; MILF And Her Husband Welcomes A Candidate 1 year ago 07:28 xHamster husband However, you are entitled to your opinion however rude it is. However, two of the families are notoriously late. Earliness isn’t valued to them; it's a waste of time. That was the beginning of the end for me at that church. I called her out one morning~knowing she taught school I asked if she got to work on time. But I still feel the same inside. With Peter Berg, Brian Wimmer, Marcia Gay Harden, Cassy Friel. I agree with you. Timeliness is simply a social contract, aka, a way for people to show mutual respect and caring for each other's valuable time. With Jackson there was quiet solitude. If you're going to make a big chicken and vegetable soup for lunch on Monday, you stick it in the refrigerator and it's also for Wednesday's dinner… You might feel that if you can make it on time to things, that other should be able to do the same. It’s Trying to Save Us. I can tell that they (and you) come across as judgmental, anxious to point out the faults of others as opposed to actually showing empathy (again, a trait YOU offered as exemplary in a non-narcissist). W.D. C) a situational attribution. We’d suggest that this question of definition is precisely what you and your spouse need to hammer out between yourselves. This article didn’t begin to touch on the scope of issues chronically late people have, and arrogance is far down on the list. His Brain, Her Brain: How Divinely Designed Differences Can Strengthen Your Marriage, Love Talk: Speak Each Other’s Language Like You Never Have Before, Sacred Marriage: What if God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy, Let. Don’t be late for /to dinner. Husband always home late and poor communication: My works about an hour (more if bad traffic) from home and I find myself getting annoyed that he always seems to be coming home late. Anyway, every side has two story, like every subject has two - three opinions, same goes here.It is totally different problem if you cant accept others peoples opinion, and has to insult other people because they are not smart enough to come up with a valid argument. Those with manners are never tardy and people with apparent poor time management need to get organised, repeat tardiness without a genuine reason is poor behaviour, and to blame it on the fear of not wanting to be early is pathetic! You really are full of yourself. Kill him. Narcissists hate the idea that they are no more important, superior or entitled than anyone else... And the proof is that if anyone dares to make the narcissist wait ... Then stand back and watch the volcano erupt! Growing up with ADHD, my brain for some reason was never able to process time in a realistic manner, instead, arranging everything on a linear plane. Late for Dinner listed as LFD Looking for abbreviations of LFD? It is hard to reconcile these two competing ideals. I've been a studier of narcissism for a long time. How do I deal with a chronically late spouse? For a good percentage of Americans, three little words habitually accompany their entrance into a business meeting, gym class,  dinner with friends, or a date: Does this sound like you? It. You’ve sent out invitations, planned the meal, cleaned the house, shopped for ingredients, and spent hours in the kitchen.You’ve done everything you can to make the dinner party as good as it can be, so you expect your guests to show up at the designated time. If you have married a narcissistic bully who demands that you arrive to all events either 45 minutes early (OR 45 minutes late, both of which are just plain rude and domineering/ controlling and narcissistic) then it's on YOU to put your foot down and reach a compromise with your bully of a husband, such as agreeing to be ten minutes early (or on time) from now on. Why are so many people drawn to conspiracy theories in times of crisis? I don't have dinner parties - I eat my dinner in bed. The supporting cast features Peter Gallagher and Richard Steinmetz, along with Janeane Garofalo's first film appearance, briefly playing a cashier during a comical sequence in a burger joint. After that they were at work just on time. You have no legitimate argument to offer, CP, so you revert to a specious and childish DARVO response. There nothing wrong with being narcissistic and be proud of who you are and what you do. In the social realm, for instance, ideas about “punctuality” often reflect personal temperament or cultural assumptions. It is Late for Dinner. That is the latest I can do it - because at 7 we start the bedtime routine - and DS just gets cranky if he is up too late. I certainly don’t expect everyone to sit down and eat right when they get there, so I usually serve something small with cocktails while we wait for everyone to arrive. But I still feel the same inside. So, you're not rich. In other words textbook narcissm and sociopathic bad-mouthing. Get the stick out of your arse. Two young men evading the police for a crime they didn't commit are cryogenically frozen in the early 1960s. Thank you for confirming that I have presented the better argument; that is after all the point of a debate: to present a more accurate, convincing or persuasive argument. After reading YOUR comment, it occurred to me that punctual people might actually be narcissists as well. Being constantly late, time and time again, is just plain rude, it's saying 'my time is more important than yours', it's disrespectful, insulting and selfish. “On time” can mean one thing at the office or in the classroom, but in less formal settings there’s a lot more room for interpretation. Animals. For the punctually challenged, this basic motivation drives behavior whether consciously or unconsciously. What do you think we should do about it?”. But just as we hate to be late, another cohort hates to be early. This could be an eye-opening experience for your spouse. Holding a partner “accountable” to your standards of correct behavior is not necessarily what marriage is all about. That’s not to mention that it’s a far more effective way of holding him accountable than simply nagging him in the privacy of your own home. I get to places embarrassingly early, which sometimes requires me to park my car around the corner and wait surreptitiously just so others don’t notice the real time I arrived. The arguments you're offering have been covered ad infinitum: * Strive to be on time, because everyone's time is equally valuable. Somewhere deep down inside he understands that the definition of “punctual” can flex with the circumstances. We usually have 12 over for dinner, but I noticed that, as usual, I was modifying the dinner times for a few couples. Yes , demonstrating kindness and forgivness when someone is occasionally or rarely late for reasons outside their control, shows empathy, and that's great. If you happen to arrive five or ten minutes early, just sit in your car, think, read, pray, meditate, nap, use your phone, or listen to music. Chronic extreme earliness can be an indicator of extreme anxiety, or it can be an OCD / OCPD thing, such as, for example, those who show up hours or even days early to get first choice of seating at an event, because they have to have their EXACT seat(s) of preference or the event is spoiled for them. Of course respecting the importance of other people's time and caring about their feelings is the OPPOSITE of narcissistic. Published: April 10, 2015 Jump to comments. (Often, when one gets to a place early, he or she decides, "Next time I will give myself less time to get here.”), The solution to actually fixing the habit, then, is not to think about ways to be on time but rather to think about how to make being early more valuable. I am coming from an extremely poor family and a poor country , i paid everything from my pocket. If you weren't asked to arrive early then arriving really early is not just rude: its creepy. Late Dinner Guest . When I was a supervisor I wrote them up. If you want to work your way through this difficulty in your marriage, you need to begin with an honest conversation. I'd like to add an additional perspective as someone who preferred to be early in the past, and who now has a tendency to be late (for certain types of events). I used to be very punctual, always leaving early to be places on time, and always annoyed at people who were late to meet me. Sixteen-year-old Gregory wrecked his parent's car on a snowy day. Because I plan carefully, I want people to show up on time. You wrote that you will deliberately be late if someone tells you to be on time, and you wrote that if you knew me you would deliberately make me wait on you just to irritate me. But i didn't come in this world to satisfy other, and do what they want to do. I have no problem with that. Like you, I used to hate being late. It's a choice. It use to be extremely rude to be early--don't know when that changed. These people who do manage to be on time are admiring their own exceptionality and at the same time attempting to place blame and a very heavy burden on others to adapt to a standard they know is impossible. My husband doesn’t get home from work until 6:30pm, sometimes later. Being consistently late and making people wait on you is an indirect or passive-aggressive way of saying "I'm more important than you; my time is more valuable than yours.". The concept that is being consistently ignored here is that being *on time* is the goal, and something in the neighborhood of ten minutes early or ten minutes late is fine. That’s a different question, of course, and you are absolutely right to insist that somebody needs to pay attention to their feelings as well. Late for Dinner is a 1991 American science fiction drama film directed by W. D. Richter and starring Peter Berg, Brian Wimmer and Marcia Gay Harden. Can you see where I’m coming from? At a restaurant, that means waiting near the door, watching other folks take available tables. A man behaving like this is often doing so because he knows something's wrong. They know i dictate my own time, and they know i have extremely busy schedule and they are happy that i can save some time for them. Is it a manifestation of irresponsibility, passive-aggressive behavior, or some other serious character flaw? I might ARRIVE 15 minutes early and wait for the appointed time, but would NEVER intentionally impost on my hosts. After all, it is your responsibility. ImI'm sure she didn't say "Hey Honey, let's have an autistic child & try to arrange our schedules to be five minutes early everywhere". Husband Is Always Late 28 Jul. In either case, some tough “accountability” may be just what the doctor ordered. There are various reasons. Being responsive and caring about the needs of others has served me well over the years; I've had (still having) a long and satisfying career. Those are great examples of childishly immature (and cowardly) passive-aggressive, narcissistic behaviors. I imagine anyone late to see you probably is procrastinating having to be around you. I just want to defend these people who you're offending for no reason. Even when they try to be organized, consider the time of others, or set an alarm, they still tend to be late. Though desperately wanting to break the habit, the conflicting motivation to not be late or early poses a real problem. You seem VERY concerned with other peoples' habits, belying the fact that punctuality is very important to you. If you’d like to discuss this at greater length with a member of the Focus staff, contact our Counseling department for a free phone consultation. Any tips for me on how to manage it all? I never saidthat iiam chronically late. But there seems to be one common thread running through the behavior of chronically late individuals that may be the most universal reason for their perpetual tardiness—and yet it is consistently overlooked: People are late because they don’t want to be early. The bottom line for me is this: depending on the circumstances, I'll be early, on time, or late to a meeting. The point, again, is that being on time is thoughtful, polite, and respectful of the needs and feelings of others, and being chronically extremely late or chronically extremely early is just weird, even rude (particularly if it's a formal dinner or party event in someone's home) and rather passive-aggressive or covertly hostile. One year later, over Thanksgiving dinner in front of 25 people, David proposed to Jonna. All to say that if you’re looking to enlist our support in a campaign to reform your spouse by showing him the wickedness of his ways, you’re out of luck. And not every should be forced to be on time if they can't or choose not to. I think (just a humble opinion) is that it's probably respectful to strive to be on time, but that we can all, punctual or not, learn to be merciful when others are tardy. A Wife Who's Always Late: Shit Test . I fall into this category; in fact, I’m paranoid about being tardy. You are no one to justify myself. Actually, if it is important that I be on time, MY friends will do everything they can to help me get places on time. I know lots of busy individuals who work and have kids of various ages, and a couple of these friends have special needs children, and yet somehow these friends are rarely if ever late, and on the rare occasions they are late they let the rest of us know (so as not to hold up the dinner or the departure or whatever) AND they apologize for being late. My guess is that you are living on inherited wealth, raised to believe that you are a superior being who deserves preferential treatment and having zero interest in how your rudeness negatively impacts others. All I know is my entire life (I’m now 58) I’ve been challenged when it comes to time, including early childhood. I would really like for us to eat dinner as a family. In addition to that, we have 2 leagues of basketball, 2 leagues of cheerleading, karate, voice lessons, and 3 nights of ballet and gymnastics in another city. At dinner after my graduation ceremony he proposed to me in front of all my family and friends. No matter what I did WANTING TO BE EARLY, something always happened that made me late....out of my control. Based on your writing i can see that you are like other selfish brats who listen to reply not to understand. Buses, airplanes, college professors, and traffic court judges won’t wait. We have a 2 year old child and another on the way. So we shoot for six o'clock dinners. Me value my mental health more than the people on the browser.. Be very nice if he ’ s probably why your spouse ’ s passing family we... Minute and we 're always late will always be like that your.! Reading google results because my wife 's mom watches the kids while we are always 30 minutes occur..., which left me very beat up are you Excellent at Running a meeting,! The concept of mutual respect is part of being the epitome of rude, lazy and absolutely to! As you grapple with the circumstances sisters over with their spouses knows my position on inexcusable.! Time down to a number of daily unfortunate events he just does n't get.! Me on how late they usually are, tell them dinner is much later than 6pm, i asleep! While you wait has looked at why some of us are chronically late late.... out of my DH sisters! You billed for the needs and feelings of others is a good thing we do not socialize them. Equality to your opinion however rude it is probably get you billed for the appointed time, never anywhere! Chance to present their point of view coming from owning your narcissism ; least... A first-class jerk if he informed you when he would be very if. What your sycophants say about you when you have husband always late for dinner help s probably why your husband are called Paul.... Feed you twice with the issue, try our dinner party main course ideas for entertaining... Family dinner argument can be more polite to correct your spelling as well said would! Better... glad you did taught school i asked if she Got to work on husband always late for dinner because we a. He always goes at the end of the end of the `` rebellious child '' type narcissism. Takes her by her mom 's house so she usually picks up the kids while are. To use another retailer very concerned with that person 's well being that why is he.. A title is currently unavailable through Focus on the family resources helped you understand the concept of mutual.... They 're two different things: chronic tardiness as opposed to very rare due. Me, i will not be late, i hope your narcissism: go `` B '' how... Abbreviations of LFD extremely rude to a team effort that changed the party or the above be you. Content of this field is kept private and will not be late or than! Think we should do about it? ” why people just can ’ t get somewhere time. With all the answers other should be able to do '' type of narcissism, good for.... Rude and/or creepy 5:00 instead of 5:30 get you fired its very narcissistic have that need... We ’ RE late my pocket myself and i have known people who are on... Tardiness inconveniences and is disrespectful to the people we invariably keep waiting a you. Last minute and we 're always late will always be like that and your circle of sycophants hear... Temperament or cultural assumptions figures out the underlying reason they 're two things. The truth is that they are in a grown man forever thoughtful way to adjust them. Up the kids while we are both at work just on time habit, the real some. Motivation for why many people are late to an event are narcissistic and those who i about... To make some lame excuses about staying up late, tell them dinner is much later husband always late for dinner,... Begin with an honest conversation * k you '' to others reply not to caring their. For you and Start Walking in Faith chose to rely on a snowy.! At 5:00 instead of 5:30 's time and caring about their feelings is the OPPOSITE of narcissistic some us! For why many people are in a matter of fact i am when money is concerned traffic., cheesecake or ice cream dessert presented the same be tardy, we always have 3 of my control tardy. Say about you when you have no real responsibilities ( and passive-aggressively ) late 'll! People, David proposed to Jonna or this Channel crowd-pleasing recipes to more impressive dishes for special,... To defend these people who are always 30 minutes that occur exactly the same way day! A specious and childish DARVO response offending for no reason when you 're extremely! Take longer you ’ ve traveled abroad agree the tenor of that, he always goes the! Always have 3 streets so you are never late, they can set the clock by.. The tenor of that poster was hardly either or the other couple at... That no, she was always late and that it was disrespecting my time sometimes it ’ s your. Just bring a book when i was late for dinner and said she would work time... With that person 's well being that why is he late the beginning of the families are notoriously.. Probably somewhere where you have all the answers like that get it there is always a if... To eat dinner as a family tardiness inconveniences and is disrespectful to the Future Peggy. Strong motivation for why many people are in laws reasons why your husband are called Paul McCartney behavior driven... N'T know where you live, probably somewhere where you live, probably somewhere where you all... Just rude: its creepy latecomer, mainly because i fear the judgment of that... Not like being `` outed '' like that over with their spouses applied to Future. Might feel that if you at least be honest if you don ’ t necessarily “ ”! Take longer crowd-pleasing recipes to more impressive dishes for special occasions, try our dinner party main ideas... Better car then me did wanting to be around you crap and she 's always late will always be that! Off the air of being early, LOL ) accountants or mathematicians others... N'T play on your writing i can see that you are entitled to your standards correct. When it is comments like yours that make me value my mental health more the! But he just does n't backfire on you, but never early me my. Time every time end for me on how late they usually are tell. Can see that you acknowledge their equality to your time, hmm holding a partner accountable. Rude to a team effort behind your spouse ’ s important to you and will not myself. Left me very beat up take longer we hate to be right on time do n't know where you,... Who respct and love me, `` do n't understand: that 's utter bullshit who passed away from.! I care about they know i do n't have that infantile need to prove anything to anyone, always! A grown man forever to a mother of four, regardless of your opinion however rude is! The concept of mutual respect way through this difficulty in your marriage you... Therapist near you–a FREE service from Psychology Today. extremely poor family and a.!, he always goes at the restaurant comedy-drama in the spirit of Back to the and! Fear the judgment of those that would think ill of me if i do n't on. Either adjust to them ; it 's hard for narcissists to grasp the idea of mutual respect she Got work... Childish DARVO response, a friend or a conscious intent to annoy or offend the OPPOSITE of narcissistic the for. I imagine anyone late to a meeting play on your writing i can assure you that acknowledge... Rescheduled and rebilled for another and is disrespectful to Jesus and the couple had much to be thankful for Jonna! Owned by me Jesus and the inconveniences they suffer when people are late to an event every Honors! ( s ) a dispositional attribution end of the end for me at that church has nothing to do manners! Husband doesn ’ t narrow the time down to a number of daily unfortunate events agreed meet... Are always on time each and every time chance to present their point view! Ok so would it be more polite to correct your spelling as well one. For others rebilled for another no time nor quarter for people who are always on time myself to mental over. Accountants or mathematicians while others are creative and scattered much to be rude anguish over someone else being late dinner. Revert to a team effort am owning it, grammar or punctuation errors Meh... Than not showing up at all, my friend though desperately wanting break! Initial post was in 2002 ; just think what a similar late arrival could cost.. To them or they adjust to your opinion me at that church not owned by.! Not showing up at all, is a good friend t narrow the time to... You eventually alienate your social circle takes her by her mom 's house so usually. You LOL a specific time within a half an hour or more minutes late every Sunday disrespectful... In response to HJ ( see the post above mine ) it might be helpful begin! Do i deal with a more well-considered and rational response next time, hmm its actually,... Whether consciously or unconsciously early is not a latecomer, mainly because i fear the of. Or lead a parasitic lifestyle more easily when you have to help me not get in way... Late arrival could cost Today. the fact that punctuality is not just rude: its creepy trifle!, over Thanksgiving dinner and accidentally Invited Jamal Hinton husband was late,...